Wherever the Music Takes Me
by mocking-jabberjay
Summary: My take on the unseen interactions between Sheldon and Amy during "The Werewolf Transformation."
1. Chapter 1

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: I do not own the Big Bang Theory, the characters in the show, or anything associated with it. Please enjoy!**

In all of Amy Farrah Fowler's life, she had never expected a night like this one to arise.

It had been a very tiring day at work, picking apart brains and perusing them for tumors as usual. The work was enjoyable enough, but she was suffering from a severe neck cramp over the hours spent hunched over various specimens. Sometimes the harsh, fluorescent lights gave her a piercing headache, and today had been one of those days. After packing her bags and trudging out of the lab, she was subjected to much of the same monotony that had befallen her before she had obtained a posse and a boyfriend: Sitting in front of the television, looking at but not really watching, allowing the white noise to numb her mind. Amy wasn't depressed or even sad at the moment - the day had just been a bit of a disappointment. No friends, no Sheldon, no time or energy to drag herself out of her apartment.

At the thought of Sheldon, her heart tugged a little bit, as did the pressure behind her eyes. No, he really was the perfect boyfriend for her, no trouble at all - most of the time. There were just moments that made her feel.. insecure. Amy wanted more out of the relationship then he did, and they both unconsciously knew it even if it wasn't spoken aloud. Sometimes she viewed his indifference as mere indifference, sometimes it poked her, sensitized her, opened her up and left her raw. Sheldon was more than she could ask for most days, but there were always a few days that left her craving more. Today had been one of those days. So they were just at different points in the relationship, he would succumb and change someday..

Or she would acquiesce and back down again, as she always had. Would he ever want to advance their relationship like she did? What if he grew tired of their "relationship of the mind," as he rigidly dubbed it? If Sheldon ever left her, pushed her to the edge, she would be broken, beyond hopeless -

_Stop. This needs to end._

Without another thought, Amy rose from the sofa, so fast it made her dizzy. She sat back down again to let the lightheadedness abate. Had the room begun to spin because of getting up too fast, or was it the overload of thoughts that had thrown her off kilter? Amy was a neurobiologist - she knew someone couldn't _really_ "overload" their brain. But that's certainly what it had felt like...

Regaining her senses, she dimly realized that this spot on the sofa was where she and Sheldon had cuddled only a few weeks before. Unexpected warmth suddenly flooded her heart, painting her cheeks with a deep blood blush. What had she been thinking? Of course Sheldon was the best, more than she could ask for. Amy found herself smiling from ear to ear when she remembered the two of them sharing the same space, breathing the same warm air. She recalled with perfect clarity the tenderness of his breath as it washed over the top of her head. The feeling of his arms wrapped around her (although tentatively and nervously so) seemed to electrify her nerves and fill her up with a deep, insatiable warmth.

Without a second thought, Amy decided to sleep right in that very spot, the spot that she always snuggled into whenever she felt lonely. Maybe she was imagining it, but she t_hought_ she could still smell his scent in the cushion, clean and comforting.

Feeling very much like a teenage girl (or at least what she thought regular teenage girls felt like), Amy let herself replay every moment of her time spent with Sheldon. Upon review, each interaction filled her up like a balloon until her heart hurt and couldn't hold any more affection. She thought about how reluctant and stubborn he had been when their relationship began, but he had been willing to take baby steps with her into a very new and empowering experience.

Before she fell asleep, Amy's last thoughts were of the words _"Amy, will you be my girlfriend?"_

_Silence, then a series of taps that echoed softly but steadily throughout the building. More quiet, followed by more percussive beats, louder this time. The pattern continued for a while, mixing with the sounds of the night. _

_The moon was cradled by the clouds high above, mixing with Amy's dreams and settling her thoughts. All was peace and quiet at last. A hopeless longing had pervaded her thoughts, however, and wouldn't quite let go.._

Amy awoke suddenly, sitting straight up. She noticed a few things at once: First, that she was on her couch instead of in bed. Second: it was still the middle of the night - the inky sky bled through the open window and throughout her apartment. She couldn't even see her hand in front of her face. Third: a series of sharp raps on the door had awoken her.

_*Knock knock knock* _"Amy."

_*Knock knock knock* _"Amy."

_*Knock knock knock* _"Amy."

Amy stood up slowly, unable to believe her ears. Had _Sheldon_ actually come to her, in the middle of the night? What did this mean? She must be dreaming.

Nope - the knocks on the door continued with increased ferocity. Amy hurried to turn on a lamp and then rushed to the door, excitement lifting her heavy eyelids and putting a bounce in her step. When she finally opened the door, there he stood: Dressed in a plaid pajamas, bongos in hand, hair unkempt and long, was her boyfriend.

"Well, aren't you going to let me in?" Sheldon asked brusquely. Amy stood for a moment, utterly bewildered. She didn't know where to begin.

The words that finally tumbled out of her mouth were, "What are you doing here? What's going on?"

"I've realized that the universe is full of chaos. In order to embrace that chaos, I must go simply where the music takes me." Brandishing his bongos, Sheldon traipsed into the apartment before Amy could get out another word. As happy as she was to see him, she still didn't understand where this nonsense was coming from.

"Are you drunk?" She asked him suspiciously.

"Of course not, Amy - you know I don't drink." He seated himself on the sofa (where she had been laying minutes before) and began to play the bongos. So, if he wasn't drunk, he had come here of his own accord, of his own free will. The thought sent fire through her veins and a sighing lilt over her hunched shoulders. Without another thought, Amy seated herself next to Sheldon and just listened to him play. The soothing beats of the drums helped drive away the stress that had been piling on the last few weeks. They could talk later; now was the time for listening.

Amy didn't know how long she had been sitting there, but Sheldon's playing created a lull, a heavy shroud that hung thickly around her. Before she knew it, she had trouble keeping her eyes open, and then all she saw was darkness, accompanied by calming taps that never failed to steady her.

Amy's eyes opened slowly, as if through a film of honey. She found that her head rested on Sheldon's shoulder and her pulse quickened. Would he ask her to move away? So far, so good - he was still playing the bongos, although more softly now.

"How long have I been asleep?" The question tumbled out before she could stop it. It was meant to be just a thought, but her curiosity got the best of her.

"A few hours. I had to change your clock, it was two minutes fast again - drove me crazy." Of course. No matter how out of character Sheldon seemed tonight, his OCD like tendencies were still there. Lifting her head (and already missing the warmth that his shoulder brought), she realized she didn't remember him even getting up. Looking toward the window, Amy saw the beginnings of the sun already starting to peek over the horizon, shooting arcs of soft pinks and purples into the indigo sky. The clock read 5:27am.

"Sheldon, why exactly are you here?"

Silence, then: "I already told you. I go where the music takes me." Amy tilted her head at him, confused. He wouldn't meet her eyes, just continued to play the bongos. Their sound started to become intrusive and brash.

"Can you stop playing those for a minute? I need to talk to you, now." Her voice came across harsher than she meant. Annoyed, Sheldon stopped playing and finally looked at her.

"Can't you see I'm trying to embrace the chaos here? However, I'm finding it to be very difficult because some hotsy-totsy won't stop jabbering."

Amy sighed, half out of annoyance and half out of amusement. _This _was the Sheldon she knew, acting like a child despite his endless brilliance. Lowering her voice, she said, "Can we please talk? I want to figure out what's going on with you. Remember when you needed Smart Amy while I was drunk? Well, I need Smart Sheldon now."

Sheldon gasped, clearly offended. "What are you talking about? I'm always a genius! Just because you choose to inebriate yourself doesn't mean that my intelligence is subject to fluctuation at its own whimsy!"

Ouch. That stung a little. However, Amy knew how to get him to answer her questions:

"You talk, or no koalas at the zoo for the next date night."


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: Thank you so much for the reviews! I must apologize, I did not plan on taking a month hiatus. Please bear with me, I'm awful at updating. **

Sheldon stopped, his mouth open in shock. His eyes flashed with anger, then faded to resignation and weariness. The change did not stop there; he now looked deeply shaken and fragile, as if he could break at the softest touch. Eyes downcast, he shakily sighed and put his head in his hands. Amy suddenly noticed how tired he looked, how sharply his bones seemed to stick out, how pale his skin seemed. It was amazing, what a little change could do to a person. A man that had seemed so in control was not subject to the same vertigo that everyone else experienced from time to time, a dizzying drop that left one reeling and gasping for breath.

Shocked and saddened by Sheldon's reaction, Amy tentatively reached out and set her hand on his shoulder, a comforting gesture. He flinched but slowly rose his head, keeping his eyes on her the whole time. Before she could take her hand away or say a word, he began to speak, softly and hatltingly. "I am sorry for how I spoke to you. That was uncalled for." He sighed and shuffled a little, prompting Amy to slowly withdraw her hand from his shoulder. He was like a baby deer - sensitive, wary, and ready to bolt at any moment.

Amy opened her mouth to speak, calmed and heartened by his apology, but Sheldon continued talking, more loudly now. "Everything is just spinning out of control for me, Amy. For all these years, I thought I knew what I was doing - I was in control, and it was perfect." The words came tumbling out now, louder and more strained. "Lately, I haven't been able to keep anything in order. I don't eat and I can't sleep. This stupid haircut is just the tip of the iceberg. What's the point of living if there's no semblance of control, no compass to guide by, no way to tell if everything will change again the next day, and again and again and _again_!"

Sheldon stopped here, simply out of words to say. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes and his chest heaved for air, gasping for a way to control this entropy, this _madness _that had intruded on his perfect life. He looked to Amy for guidance, trying to comfort himself with the fact that at least _she_ wasn't going anywhere.

At least, he hoped so.

Throughout Sheldon's impromptu outburst, Amy had been peering at his face, trying hard to sympathize with him. Her heart ached at the tears that made his blue eyes glisten - she had never seen him cry before - and tried to summon words that would heal his pain.

All that came out was "Sheldon.." before her voice broke and tears glazed over her own vision. Unable to communicate with words, she pulled him into a hug before he could say another word. Amy wasn't sure how he would react, but he cautiously wrapped his arms around her after a few long seconds, his breaths now more calm and steady. She closed her eyes and sighed into his shoulder, trying to convey her sorrow and spread the warmth of comfort throughout him.

After a minute, she relinquished her grip and looked into Sheldon's face again. Some of the color had returned and his eyes no longer bore their teary film. He sniffled like a child and said thickly, "Thank you. I didn't think anybody could comfort me, but I guess I was wrong." Amy raised her eyebrows - it took a lot for Sheldon to admit he was wrong.

"Would you like a hot beverage?" Amy asked, rising off the couch. "I have chamomile tea." He nodded, now faintly smiling.

When she came back with the steaming tea a few minutes later, he was asleep. Eyes closed, he had fallen asleep sitting with his head leaning on the arm of the couch. Shaking him gently, Amy tried to wake him slowly and quietly.

"Danger!" He shouted, bolting upright.

"No, Sheldon, it's just me, Amy!" She handed him his tea, coaxing him to drink carefully. Amy sat back on the couch and watched him thoughtfully. Sheldon was too exhausted to notice. The clock read 5:42am. Would Sheldon go home, or could he perhaps stay with her?

**To be continued! Thanks for reading! I'm not sure if this lines up with everything that was said in the actual episode (I might be forgetting/changing a few things), but please bear with me! :)**


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